How the Grinch Stole Graphics

Most people in Blogville liked graphics a lot.
But the Grinch, south of Blogville,
would give them no thought.
The Grinch hated graphics! For every danged season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knew the reason.
It could be her head wasn’t screwed on quite right.
It could be, perhaps, that her shoes were too tight.
(I think that the reason most likely of all
may have been that her heart was two sizes too small.)
But whatever the reason, her heart or her shoes,
she stood there all Advent, still puzzled, confused.
She stared from her cave with a sour, Grinchy frown
at the warm, lighted windows below in their town.
She knew every blogger in Blogville beneath
was busily hanging a MySpace-type wreath.

“They’re posting their glitter!” she snarled with a sneer.
Those darned Christmas graphics – they’re practically here!”
Then she growled, with her mouse fingers nervously drumming,
“I must find a way to keep graphics from coming…”
For tomorrow, she knew, all the bloggers up early
would rush for their cursors and cause hurley-burley.
They’d scroll through their favs and they’d post from their links,
and they’d copy from Facebook with barely a blink.
And then they’d do something she liked least of all.
Every blogger in Blogville, the tall and the small,
would welcome in Christmas with hardly a word.
They wouldn’t choose adjectives, adverbs or nouns,
they’d use photos and graphics with nary a frown.
And the more the Grinch thought of the glitter they’d bring,
the more the Grinch thought, “I must stop this whole thing!
For nearly a year I’ve put up with it now.
I must stop those graphics! The question is, how?”

“I know what to do,” said the Grinch in a minute.
And she made a red coat and a hat, and got in it.
She chuckled and clucked, “What a great Grinchy trick.
With this coat and this hat, I’ll look just like Saint Nick!”
“All I need is a reindeer…”
And the Grinch looked around.
But since reindeer are scarce, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the Grinch?
No! The Grinch simply said,
“If I can’t find a reindeer, I’ll make one, instead.”
So she called her cat, Dixie, and took some red thread
and tied up a horn on the top of her head.

Then she cleaned out her hard drive and cleaned it out more.
She emptied her trash bin of folders galore.
She hitched up poor Dixie, who started to freak
and headed to Blogville, a language-crazed geek.
As the sleigh gathered speed and started straight down
toward the homes where the bloggers lay sleeping in town,
their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.
Those bloggers were dreaming sweet dreams without care.
Their hard drives were defragged, their viruses cleaned,
their firewalls stout against hackers unseen.
But the Grinch found a chimney – a rather tight pinch -
and if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch.
She got stuck only once, for a moment or two,
then she poked her head out of the fireplace flue.
The glittery stockings were hung in a row.
“Those stockings,” she grinned, “are the first things to go.

Then she slithered around with a smile most unpleasant
throughout the whole room, and deleted the presents.
Ipads! And bicycles! Skateboards and drums!
Cuisinarts! Baby dolls! Laptops and plums!
Once she’d poofed them away, the Grinch, very nimbly
deleted the gifs of the bags and the chimney.
Then she turned to the icebox, deleting the feast.
She deleted the pudding!  erased the roast beast!
She cleaned out that icebox as quick as a flash -
why, that Grinch even trashed their last can of hash.
Then she looked at the scene with a satisfied glee.
“And NOW!” grinned the Grinch, “I’ll delete that danged tree.”
The Grinch grabbed the cursor and started to click
when she heard a small sound like a tap-tapping stick.
She turned around fast, and saw a small Tweeter -
a Blogger’s young child who couldn’t be sweeter.

The Grinch had been caught by this little blog daughter
who’d left her warm bed for a cup of cold water.
She stared at the Grinch and said, “Why, Santa? Why?
You’re taking our tree? Our Christmas tree? Why?”
But you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
she thought up a lie, and she thought it up quick.
“Why, my sweet little tot,” the fake Santy Clause lied,
“there’s a light on this tree that won’t light on one side.
I’m taking it home to my workshop, my dear.
I’ll fix it up there, and then bring it back here.”
Her fib fooled the child, so she patted her head,
and got her a drink and sent her to bed.
The babe went to bed with no way to see
the Grinch click on the mouse and delete her fine tree!
As she went out the door, that foolish old liar,
the last thing she took was the log for their fire.
The one speck of image still left in the house
was a crumb that was even too small for a mouse.

At a quarter-past dawn, with the bloggers abed,
she went to her desk to recycle the sled.
Her bin overflowed with both ribbons and wrappings -
the tinsel and tags! The trimmings and trappings!
As she opened the bin to finally dump it,
“Begone, all you bloggers!” she was Grinch-ish-ly humming.
“They’re finding out now that no Christmas is coming!
They’re just waking up. I know what they’ll do.
Their mouths will hang open a minute or two
and then those poor bloggers will all cry, ‘Boo-Hoo’!”
“That’s a noise,” grinned the Grinch,
“that I simply must hear.”
So she paused. And the Grinch put a hand to her ear.
And she did hear a sound rising over the snow
that started out low, then clearly did grow.
But the sound wasn’t sad.
It sounded quite merry.
It couldn’t be so – but it surely was Merry!
As she stared down at Blogville
the Grinch popped her eyes.
Then she shook
at the sight of a shocking surprise!

Every blogger in Blogville, the tall and the small,
was posting without any glitter at all.
She hadn’t stopped Christmas by trashing the pics,
the trees or the cookies or even St. Nick.
And the Grinch, with her Grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow
stood puzzling and puzzling: “How can it be so?
It came without glitter! It came without gifs!
It came without videos, YouTubes or tifs.”
And she puzzled three hours, ’til her puzzler was sore,
until thinking of something she hadn’t before.
“Maybe Christmas,” she thought, “doesn’t come from our words,
the glitter we post or the songs that we’ve heard.
Maybe Christmas is more than our words and our art.
Maybe Christmas, at best, still comes from the heart.”
And what happened then?
Well, in Blogville they say
that the Grinch’s small heart
grew three sizes that day!
And the minute her heart didn’t feel quite so tight
she whizzed with her cursor through bright morning light.
She brought back the gifs and the glittery headers,
and pinned back the links for the Twitter defenders.
She posted the candles, the presents and trees
before laughing herself, with a Christmas-tide glee.
“I love plain old words,” she said with a smile.
But Christmas is here! Let’s indulge with some style!

Comments always are welcome. To leave a comment or respond, just click below. Please – NO Reblogging.    And if you’ve never read the original book, “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”,  put it on your list for Santa – or better yet, get it for yourself and read it now. Your heart will grow at least three sizes.  I promise.

The URI to TrackBack this entry is: http://shoreacres.wordpress.com/2013/12/13/how-the-grinch-stole-graphics/trackback/

RSS feed for comments on this post.

80 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Hello Linda:

    While reading an e-book about J. Edgar Hoover, I heard a tiny noise from my iPad indicating that I had an e-mail on the waiting list. Immediately I opened it and found your “difficult-to-describe” poem about Grinch, Christmas and bloggers.

    Being a blogger myself, I “relished” your poem even more. Specially the following words:

    “And then they’d do something she liked least of all.
    Every blogger in Blogville, the tall and the small,
    would welcome in Christmas with hardly a word.
    They wouldn’t choose adjectives, adverbs or nouns,
    they’d use photos and graphics with nary a frown.”

    I read it once, twice, thrice, and am now tickling the keys of my computer totally “speechless”. An Italian would say, “Bravo!”. I will opt to stay speechless.

    Thank you again, and again, and again.

    Warm Regards,

    Omar.-

    • Omar,

      I’m so glad you were tickled enough to tickle the keys of your computer. I’ve always loved the story of the Grinch, and it was tremendous fun to adapt it for bloggers. We can be a grinchy group ourselves from time to time – a little light fun-poking never hurt anyone.

      Of course, my words here are only an adaptation of Dr. Seuss’s words. If you’ve not read the original, be sure to do so. The Twisters would love it!

      Thanks for all the kind words – I appreciate them.

      Linda

  2. Wonderful! So much fun. I love it! More, more!

    • Martha,

      Here’s to pretty flowers and word-bouquets. They’re both cheerful and fun and just the ticket for the holidays.

      Late this afternoon I was imagining the Grinch in that bar with the great glass block walls. I wonder if the Grinch drinks absinthe? Sure would fit in with the color scheme.

      Linda

      • Grinch and absinthe…ha! Good imagery!

  3. Clever. Plenty of wordy gifts in this extended poem. I especially liked the roast beasts.

    • Rosemary,

      I’m not sure when it happened – sometime long after I’d left my parents’ home – I came back for a holiday and my dad had started talking about roast beast. I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about. It seems one of the televised Grinch programs had popped up, and he thought “roast beast” was so funny he started using it. He was a great one for word play anyway, so I wasn’t too surprised.

      Glad you enjoyed it!

      Linda

  4. Wonderfully done! I loved every word!

    • Thanks, montucky. Even big people enjoy a story now and then, and the season’s meant to be enjoyed!

      Linda

  5. Maybe I should blame the Grinch for my wordless blog these days. Great adaptation!

    • Martha,

      It’s good to see you. I thought you might have been doing some traveling. I hope you’re back to “normal” as far as being able to get out and about.

      I feel like I’ve finally “adapted”, myself. That’s probably the reason I adapted the Grinch – it was pure fun, and a very “Christmas-like” thing to do. I’m in the mood.

      Best wishes for a wonderful holiday!

      Linda

    • May I use Martha’s excuse for my non-posting? My grinch is the cable bill I’m avoiding for now. I’m here at the public library which is a perpetual gift from Santa!

      Linda, this post is adorable!

      • Claudia,

        Oops! You sneaked into the middle of all this and I missed you. Maybe if I’m lucky you haven’t been back to the library to notice until now. I did get an email notice – no problem on your end, just on mine.

        I surely do understand about that cable bill and etc. About once a month, I go through this thing I call “iPadiPodtabletsmartPhoneiPhoneKindleWhatever”. Then I figure out what everything would cost, and I think – maybe later. Or not. Thank goodness for libraries!

        Glad you liked the post. I hope the season is bringing you lots of good things, including a lot of enjoyment!

        Linda

  6. I came down the stairs and sat down in my chair
    and read of a “born again” Grinch with green hair.
    Witchy and wicked she took things away, but soon
    learned that love would help re-claim the day.

    I wanted to Share and proclaim nothing sweeter to
    HuffPost or the Times, or at least, Utne Reader.
    By Pinterest or Facebook I knew it would spread
    so I shared it with millions and then went to bed!

    Bravo, Linda. Redeemed!

    • Monica,

      What a treat your verses are. I love that you even got the Utne Reader in there – that’s a little unusual, and special, just like your own writings.

      To paraphrase the beloved River Rat, there’s nothing half so much worth doing as messing around with words. I’m glad you enjoyed my messing about!

      Linda

  7. Hi Linda,

    This is just so beautiful… I had so much fun reading it!

    Bravo, indeed….

    Jojang

    • Jojang,

      I love the Christmas season. Some seasons have been extraordinarily joyful and one or two have been pretty dismal. But celebrating’s always in order,and I think the Grinch is a wonderful addition to our celebrations. I’m glad you had fun with this – as I did.

      Thanks for the gift of your comment. Merry Christmas!

      Linda

  8. Lord have mercy, Linda. Your talent never ceases to amaze me. This one had to take some “doing.” And it surely is funny and priceless. Loved it and Dixie bless her beautiful cat self is the shining star of this Christmas poem. I enjoyed this so much. “You done good” as we say in Texas. ~yvonne

    • Yvonne,

      I call that expression on Miss Dixie’s face her “Me, Cat. You? Worthless” expression. A friend who knows her in real life knew immediately that some pretty clumsy photoshopping had taken place. She knew there was no way I was tying anything onto that cat’s head or tying something under her chin.

      When you start with something as good as Dr. Seuss’s Grinch, you really can’t go wrong. Still, I was pretty tickled with how this came out. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

      Linda

  9. I remember well the Grinch who turned into a glitter semi-fan. I like them both, but I prefer the glitter Grinch.
    As to your ability to create magic with your words, I have said it before, you are a master.

    Wishing you a Merry and Blessed Christmas.

    Maria

    • Maria,

      I see that Gué remembered the genesis of this, too. If it hadn’t been for a certain grinchy sort roaming around back then (eight years ago!) telling me as I was getting started that good blogs should contain only text… Well, what did I know? Back then, not much.

      On the other hand, that experience became a primary lesson in writing/blogging – to trust my own instincts. That’s not a bad lesson to learn no matter how it comes to us.

      I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I’m growing rather fond of that glittery little elf, myself!

      Linda

  10. No glitter here yet.
    Merry Christmas, Linda!

    • Unless the frost counts!

      • Lynda,

        I think your frost certainly does count. It’s as beautiful as anything the graphic artists can come up with. Of course, if frost is your glitter, that makes the sun play the role of the Grinch, no? You could do your own version of the Grinch-in-the-Garden!

        Enjoy the season!

        Linda

        • Yes, thank you, and you as well!

  11. cute (very)

    • Thanks, Bob. Happy you stopped by – you’re always welcome!

      Linda

  12. Bravo!! My sides are split! The look on DixieRose! Ha!!!
    I’ll think of this when I start to get grumpy, and that’s sure to send the grumps away! :-)

    • eremophila,

      I just amused myself by browsing through my photos of Dixie. I don’t have that many, but the look you see up above is well represented. There are times I’m convinced that, compared to Dixie, the Grinch is a pussycat.

      I say begone! with the grumps. Having to deal with real sorrows during a holiday season is one thing. But just being grumpy for the sheer pleasure of grumpiness is another – and so unnecessary, as the Grinch learned!

      You might ask Fred how he’d feel about antlers…

      Linda

  13. Glitter or not, ’tis wonderful, Linda.

    Merry Christmas to you!

    • Merry Christmas to you, Gary.

      Seeing you here made me think of your studio, which reminded me of the great snowfalls of my childhood. There’s no glitter in the world better than the glint and glitter of cold sunlight on fresh snow. I see you’re getting snow today, with sunshine to follow. Enjoy Mother Nature’s glitter for me!

      Linda

  14. Oh, gosh, let me catch my breath here and wipe a few laughter tears away. What a hoot!

    I’d rather forgotten your irritation at excess gifs and graphics.

    What a hilarious reminder.

    • Gué,

      Maria remembered, too. Live and learn, as they say. I got a good bit of bad advice my first six months of blogging, but I also got one very good piece of advice – to begin a blog here at WordPress. The rest, as they say, is history.

      And as they also say – if we can’t laugh at ourselves, it’s going to be really painful when everyone else laughs at us. Or something like that.

      Thanks for laughing along!

      Linda

  15. Love Dr. Seuss and your Grinch rendition. Love the spell you both cast on words. After reading this I find I can’t keep from rhymin’. While reading this found me just a-smilin’. Once again I find your word plays inspirin’.

    In fact, it was hard to switch to the prose in the comments.

    Your comment to Martha made me stop to re-read. I found myself finding more rhymes in your words.
    “Here’s to pretty flowers and word-bouquets.
    They’re both cheerful and fun …. for the holidays.”

    Delightful writing, Linda, simply contagious in word and spirit. Merry Christmas to you and Happy Holidays to all.

    • Georgette,

      I smiled at you getting “caught up” in rhyming. Now and then I’ll find myself composing limericks right and left – it just happens, and it’s so much fun.

      I suspect you’ve done your share of reading Dr. Seuss aloud. I had a little record player and either a 78 or 45 rpm recording of “Gerald McBoingBoing” (1952) that was my introduction to his work. “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas” wasn’t published until 1957, when I was eleven. Some of the others, like “The Cat in The Hat” came along even later, so I didn’t enjoy them as a child.

      We did have Munro Leaf and his Ferdinand the Bull, though. And I just saw on that page that his ten-book set that includes “Manners Can Be Fun” is being reissued. Someone should have given the Grinch a copy of “How to Behave, and Why”!

      I’m so glad you found some delight in the post. Merry Christmas to you – and a fine New Year, too!

      Linda

  16. I do believe you’ve outdone yourself. I’m wondering how many hours of sanding and varnishing it took for this to play around in that brilliant literary mind of yours? Word pictures galore, but then I fall short of the perfect words to describe what you’ve done here. Utterly fun, creative, genius, just absolutely holiday fantastic!

    • Bayou Woman,

      Dr. Seuss did the heavy lifting on this one.Once I had the title in mind, things began falling into place. There were a couple of lines where I just couldn’t find a good rhyme, and I had to work around those, but it didn’t take much thought – just a few hours with my seat in a chair.

      I think there’s a lesson there – I’m going to try and apply it in the coming year.

      When you have a minute, I was pointed to this Neil Gaiman piece by another blogger. I think you’ll enjoy it, even it you have to put it off until after all the holiday hoopla. But it might be a nice break.

      Linda

      • Started my morning with coffee and this piece. First, I’m ashamed to say I’m not familiar with such a well honored writer, but that’s not the point here. I think probably the best things written are based on ideas that come out of our own heads. However, those ideas are often sparked by other stimuli. My problem is that I have so many ideas, I don’t know where to start, and (with all the distractions of otherwise paying the bills) I lack the self discipline to sit for hours and get something on the screen about said ideas.

        And then there is that looming, unspoken fear that hangs in the cobwebs of my mind, which I occasionally brush past in the dark–the fear that the words won’t come; and it is that fear which paralyzes me and keeps me from settling on one idea and determining to write X number of hours a day on that idea. It’s called the fear of failure. What if I can’t do it? What if the characters aren’t believable? What if the plot falls apart? What if, what if, what if?

        I do appreciate what Neil has to say regarding what questions to ask yourself to spark the words to come . . . and I have bookmarked that page.

        Thanks for sharing this with me, and I am encouraged by both your doing so and by his words.

        • Re: all those ideas – it’s one of my biggest problems. My goal for 2013 was to get at least one, maybe two of the short stories I have in my head fleshed out. It didn’t happen. And so many drafts could be turned into nice posts, but it takes focus, and right now I’ve got the attention span of a curious two year old. Everything is fascinating – and with the years ticking down, my time for learning is limited.

          As for fear of failure, I’ll thank you right now for giving me my New Year’s post, and one of the world’s weirdest resolutions. More about that later, of course.

          In the meantime, don’t forget what computer genius Alan Kay once said. “If you’re not failing 90% of the time, you’re not aiming high enough.”

          Happy Day!

  17. Oh, so fantastic. I loved it from beginning to end. Delightful. Yes, it delighted me. That’s it. Oops, and thanks for the smiles.

    • Bella Rum,

      I’m so glad. Delight sometimes seems in short supply in this world of ours. I was reminded of something else today that delighted me when it first came out. Take a good look at 0:57 – that’s our volunteer fire department dancing up a storm with Matt. Keep an eye out for San Diego, too. You’ll smile even more.

      Linda

  18. Your mention of Santy Clause calls up the venerable Marx Brother skit from A Night at the Opera:

    • That’s so funny. I’d forgotten it. Thanks to Youtube, I’ve now seen more Marx Brothers skits than I’ve seen in the past decade. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop. Thanks for the great connection!

      Linda

  19. Great job of adapting the Grinch for bloggers Linda. –Curt

    • Thanks, Curt. I suspect the Grinch is infinitely adaptable, wonderful creature that he is.

      Linda

    • It’s taken me this long to snap to and remember that Dr. Seuss even got a nod at the 2011 Burning Man. It was really fun watching this again after seeing all your pics and reading your commentary.

      • I agree Linda– somer fun. Peggy and I missed 2011 but I think the BM Dr. Seuss video did a great job of capturing the event. Thanks for sharing. –Curt

  20. I have to agree some of those gifs and whatnot that people adorn their Christmas blogs with are pretty kitschy. You said it much better than I could. –I do like the Christmas Tinkerbell, though.

    • WOL,

      I was curious and went back to check some dates. I started paying attention to blogs in 2005, which was not only the heyday of MySpace, but also just after the time when Facebook and WordPress were born.

      The conflict between “text only” and “oh, pretty!” could get pretty intense in those days. It took me a while to figure out that the people who were telling me how to make use of the internet were IRC and listserve sorts who had no time for anything as pedestrian as “graphics”.

      I was lucky enough to bump into the concept of “visual rhetoric” early on. I began to see web pages as an entirely new form of communication, and was saved! Hallelujah!

      I like the Christmas Tinkerbell, too. I had to search a little to find her, but she surely is cute.

      Linda

  21. Oh that was just brilliant. Thank you so much for sharing it with us!

    • IzaakMak,

      Thank you so much! It was fun to do – I’m happy you enjoyed it.

      It’s nice to see you, too. I hope your holiday season’s a good one, in every way.

      Linda

  22. So lovely so beautiful… I loved this key…. You are amazing dear Linda, Thank you, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year, love, nia

    • nia,

      When I saw this Grinch, I thought of you right away and smiled!

      I’m happy you liked the little story. Merry Christmas to you, too!

      Linda

  23. How clever you are, Linda! The Grinch is one of those fascinating Scrooge-like characters we can’t help but love (once they’ve reformed, of course!)

    I’m thinking you’re onto something deeper here. The writer side of me, of course, fully embraces words, particularly the “right” words in the right context; the web designer in me, however, fully embraces the colors, the images, the audio and video, of trying to tell a story by getting people’s attention however you can! Perhaps we can find a way to blend the two tastefully?!

    • Debbie,

      I could say your comment tickled the Dickens out of me, but that would be just too easy!

      Finding ways for words and images to complement one another is tough. I can’t imagine posting something that’s all text. On the other hand, I can’t imagine posting blinking lights, either. The only way my glittery little friend got into this post was as a clear illustration of a point. But just to attract attention? Not happening – at least here.

      Music’s another tough one. I use it from time to time, but if I post a YouTube video, I look for one that’s as pleasing visually as musically. Most of the time, I prefer a player like the one I added here. And if I land on a website where music already is blaring – I’m gone.

      Eventually, of course, the purpose of the blog entry (book, article, essay, poem, etc) will help to determine the format. But even where photographs or other images aren’t used, there are questions of font, spacing, text color and so on to deal with – as you so well know.

      One of the things that amuses me at this time of year is that WordPress encourages the use of falling snow as a seasonal addition. It is fun, and it can be very pretty, but it slows things down for people who aren’t whizzing around the web at warp speed. I just tested my page load times the other day, and need to do some cleaning up. I guess I’ll put that project on the list of things to do after Christmas.

      Anyway – yes. Drawing people in is the point – as long as we remember that it’s content that comes first.

      Linda

  24. Ingenious and original, both graphics and words! I’m sure this will become a Christmas classic a la social commentary in Blogville from this day forward. Yes, that first Noel out in the manger was pitch dark except the stars in the sky, and maybe a candle or two. How far we’ve come and how much we’ve changed.

    • Arti,

      Oh, I’m pretty sure we don’t have a classic here, but it surely was a lot of fun to create. When you get right down to it, the fun of creation was at the heart of our Christmas celebrations when I was young – baking cookies, bringing home the tree and decorating it, wrapping gifts in creative ways, making cards for our schoolmates.

      Really, I could go on and on. There were paper chains, bells made with foil shaped over thimbles, popcorn and cranberry garlands for the trees. We celebrated Santa Lucia with saffron buns, and shared them with the Polish neighbors. In turn, they shared their oplatki (Christmas wafers) with us.

      The rest of the world can shop itself to death and argue over the manger scenes if they like. I’m in the mood for other forms of celebration, including those stars and a candle or two.

      Linda

  25. I love how your subtitle is “A Writer’s On-Going Search for the Right Word. You found them. You found them all with a set of rhymes that would dazzle Stephen Sondheim! I love this to the max, as one might expect. Gift and tif? Beautiful! This is so darned clever, so darned fun, and like all your work, weaves itself into a rich, fully-completed circle. One of your best, to be sure; simply brilliant. All I can say, and I’ll say it just right, this post is terrific, a real delight!

    • Jeanie,

      Gift and tif was especially fun. “Tif” is one of those words that’s just been hanging around in the back of my mind, hoping I’d use it some day – and it finally got to come out and play.

      I did think the cat carols needed a rest, and this seemed a good replacement. Who knows what will show up next year?

      By the way – speaking of someone showing up, look who’s in my neighborhood! He showed up about two weeks ago, on a strong cold front, and has been hanging out on the swim platform of a boat docked across from my place. The photo’s not the best, as he’s almost beyond the reach of my zoom, but it’s good enough. He comes over every morning and naps there in the sunshine, protected from the cold north wind. I assume Harry’s gone from your place now – maybe this is one of his cousins. Who knows? Maybe it’s Harry!

      Thanks for your own rhyming compliments! They’re a joy to receive.

      Linda

  26. Incredibly clever, as ALWAYS! Can I blame him as well, for my complete lack of time and posts? :)

    • FeyGirl,

      Why not? Think of it as a holiday version of “The dog ate my homework”. The Grinch poofed my blog” has rather a nice ring to it, and maybe even a bit more truth. After all, there are a lot of grinchy realities that can keep us from our art!

      Thanks for the nice words. I hope your season is lovely, and that you’re finding much joy.

      Linda

  27. Well, that is simply brilliant! I’m still laughing, and will for a time, I’m sure. Bravo many times over. I’m not sure Disney will be able to do it justice (I’m assuming a contract is in the mail).

    • Allen,

      I have a feeling the people-in-charge-of-residuals already have Mr. Grinch all sewn up. Parody’s fair use, but to get Disney to come calling I imagine I’d have to start from scratch.

      If I made you laugh, that’s just fine by me. It was great fun for me to write it, too. Just saying that poses an interesting question. Of those three stand-up comedians you saw, did the one you found most appealing seem to be enjoying himself more? I wonder if that’s a clue to the difference between comedians who can pull us in and those who don’t. It might not be just the material. I don’t really have an opinion about it, but it’s interesting to think about.

      Linda

      • Great question. Certainly the one who was least funny was more self conscious and seemed to be grasping to win our approval. The funniest fellow was very self confident, and did appear to be having fun, but it could all be part of the act. In fact I have seen comedians on TV use self consciousness to great comedic benefit. But when I think about teachers I have known, those who seem to be enjoying the subject matter, the students, and the process were by far the best communicators and instructors.

  28. Oh, what fun! You are certainly enjoying the season — I didn’t know (but could probably guess) about your aversion to blog bling. Though I’m hoping Dixie’s participation was in words only. Can’t imagine her allowing ANY of that! Love her gorgeous eyes.

    • nikkipolani,

      Of course you’re right about Miss Dixie. I would no more attempt to truly tie something to her head than I’d head off to a shopping mall the weekend before Christmas. This was my awkward attempt at photoshopping, of course. It did well enough, and I laugh every time I look at it. She is a lovely thing, isn’t she? When she focuses those eyes on me, I usually pay attention.

      I’m not a very “blingy” person, generally. You’ll not find any glitter on my fingernails, or jeweled tee shirts in my closet. I do intend to decorate up some of those sugar cookies, though. Thanks for sharing the recipe!

      Linda

  29. Loved the whole Seussian effect! Clever Texas gal! Have the Merriest Linda—I’m so far behind, but I’ll catch up soon. Kayti

    • Kayti,

      We’re all behind, and none of us ever will “catch up” – it’s the nature of life.

      That’s all right. This is a time for enjoyment. If we do any “catching up”, it should be with people, after all. And maybe even with ourselves.

      Glad you enjoyed the post. A “clever” from you is a very nice gift!
      Merry Christmas to you and Dr. Advice!

      Linda

  30. This is fabulous! I love it:) Now I need to go & find just the right Christmas graphic to go with our annual poem. Ha!

    • The Bug,

      Glad to have provided a little inspiration, and I’m really glad you enjoyed it. I’m even more glad you got your good health news before Christmas, so you really can enjoy writing your Christmas poem. Just don’t get too graphic! ;)

      Linda

  31. This is absolutely wonderful Linda.
    I loved every word, although I nearly went to remove all my glittery graphics after reading the first half of the entry – you were so convincing! lol
    Wishing you, and Dixie reindeer a Very Merry Christmas.

    • Sandi,

      Not to worry – the Grinch clearly has reformed, and your glitter is safe.
      I’m glad you enjoyed it a little playfulness, and I’m also glad to see your glitter’s still in place.

      Do you think that Max would like to join Dixie’s reindeer team in the future? Can you imagine?!

      Linda

  32. Dear Linda,
    I am putting right here on this Grinch essay, that for a long time I have found your writing and yourself inspiring to me. You make me want to be a better writer and even more daring on career choices!

    If you would like to have it, the Very Inspring Blogger Award is yours! You know I have not been active with the awards, but I thought I had very good reason to share this this time because I had friendships which did personally inspire me when I was feeling terrible. Just a way to say thanks to the superb influence you are to everyone and to me personally!

    Merry Christmas and a Happy 2014!

    • Judy,

      First of all, it’s one of the best gifts of the season to see you out and about and posting again. I know that having the surgery behind you and being well on the road to recovery will contribute to the pleasures of the season.

      Thank you for including me in your group of “inspiring bloggers”. I’ve never set out to be inspiring, but if I’ve managed to provide some support along the way or renewed someone’s enthusiasm for writing – well, nothing could be better.

      Since reading your post, another memory has surfaced. A friend with a truly warped (read: unutterably funny) sense of humor once left a large, black, danged realistic spider in the cabin up at The Place. When I finally came across it, I shrieked like a madwoman. That was it. Every time I went back to that cabin, that spider was there, waiting for me. I knew it. I reminded myself. Sometimes I looked around to see if I could find it. Then, I’d forget, until I’d run across it again, and shriek.

      I’m really so easy, and so gullible. Another friend says the single word on my tombstone needs to be, “REALLY?!?”

      Thanks so much for the award, and for your friendship. Here’s to an even more productive and creative 2014.

      Merry Christmas!

      Linda

  33. There’s an old saying: “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” I much prefer your version, though, especially this:

    “It came without glitter! It came without gifs!
    It came without videos, YouTubes or tifs.”

    Merry Christmas, Linda.

    • Merry Christmas to you, Charles. No one ever said it had to be EITHER madrigals and motets OR funny, good-humored celebration. I’ve always been big on both/and, so I’ll offer a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Thanks so much for stopping by – hard to believe we’ve another year behind us!

      Linda

  34. It was lots of fun reading your modern Christmas tale for a digital age, Linda. And Dixie’s in fine form there, I see! By the way, I can’t find that Christmas key on my keyboard, and it’s got me worried…

    • Isn’t Dixie just a caution with her antlers? I had such fun putting this together – not least because I love seeing what people pick up on. One reader found the “Santa Clause” – you mentioned the Christmas key. It’s wonderful to give people something to smile about during a season that occasionally can be irritating, stressful, or sad.

      I do hope your Christmas was enjoyable, comfortable and filled with good photo opportunities! Here’s to a new year filled with even more enjoyment!

      Linda

  35. YOU are amazing! I’d write more, but I want the brilliant essence of this to linger in my mind!

    • I’m tickled you enjoyed it, Z. A little playfulness is good for the soul – as you so well know!

      Linda


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 4,957 other followers